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The new Conan movie thread
I looked around for a thread on this and didn't find one, so here we are...

But anyway! They've leaked an actual clip from the upcoming film.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VXniszN2SWQ

I gotta say, I've been getting more and more downhearted about this project the more I've heard about it, culminating with that trailer they released - just a generic save-the-world fantasy action blockbuster thingy with slo-mo "action", cheap CGI, gratuitous explosions, and some familiar names thrown in the mix.

But this... this... is freaking awesome! Just a short clip of child Conan kicking ass and taking heads. And there's Ron Perlman, and he's way cool. I think those are supposed to be Picts, BTW - they do certainly look the part, which is nice, even if they sound like they're auditioning for a monster movie. And it actually looks surprisingly much like the beginning of the old Milius film (the first one; let's not talk about the second), in a good way, only with updated aesthetics, more dynamic action and no stupid he-became-a-mighty-warrior-by-turning-a-big-wheel-for-his-entire-youth backstory...

Put short, now I'm all stoked again! :cool:

Can't wait to see this in theaters. And The Hobbit (I lost a bet and now I'm not allowed to shave until I've seen it; at least I'll fit in with the dwarves). And John Carter (of Mars). It's a great time to be a geek. :D


Last edited by Mikko Kuusirati on Tue 19 Jul, 2011 10:45 pm; edited 1 time in total
I remain dubious. I'm sure it won't be as bad as I fear, but neither will it be anything worthy of the name "Conan." My general opinion is that they have on their hands a potentially great fun generic fantasy flick - why make it a Conan film? The 1980's brought a slew of fantasy/sword & sorcery films (both good and terrible) besides Conan, why not just name this something else? "The Hyborean Kid" or "Cimmerian Nights" if you must give a nod to Howard, but perhaps just something outlandish, like "Barbarian Bloodlust" or "Head Start." :P

Rather than try to ride on the success (and not all of it has even been that) of former works, why not bust out something, I dunno... new? New-ish? Then at least you'd have a shot at making a dent in cinematic history. As it is, they will always be subject to comparison, and from what I've seen, most of it won't be favorable. I hope they prove me wrong.
Eric Meulemans wrote:
I remain dubious. I'm sure it won't be as bad as I fear, but neither will it be anything worthy of the name "Conan." My general opinion is that they have on their hands a potentially great fun generic fantasy flick - why make it a Conan film? The 1980's brought a slew of fantasy/sword & sorcery films (both good and terrible) besides Conan, why not just name this something else? "The Hyborean Kid" or "Cimmerian Nights" if you must give a nod to Howard, but perhaps just something outlandish, like "Barbarian Bloodlust" or "Head Start." :P

Rather than try to ride on the success (and not all of it has even been that) of former works, why not bust out something, I dunno... new? New-ish? Then at least you'd have a shot at making a dent in cinematic history. As it is, they will always be subject to comparison, and from what I've seen, most of it won't be favorable. I hope they prove me wrong.

My hopes aren't high either. You can only have ONE Conan... Arnold is Conan. I suppose a fan of the comics will be thrilled, but as I'm only a fan of the original "Conan the Barbarian" (NOT the Destroyer...), I'm pretty unexcited.
I am left quite flat by this clip and especially by the trailer. I'm so bored with overdone CGI that makes a movie look like a video game. Yawn.
Just FYI: My antivirus pitched a fit and said my computer was attacked when I clicked your link...
Myles Mulkey wrote:
My hopes aren't high either. You can only have ONE Conan... Arnold is Conan. I suppose a fan of the comics will be thrilled, but as I'm only a fan of the original "Conan the Barbarian" (NOT the Destroyer...), I'm pretty unexcited.

As a fan of Howard's original stories, I gotta say, Ahnuld played a lumbering musclebound fool with no will or agency of his own; IMO the first Milius film is a classic despite its main character, not because of him.

It seems the new movie will tread some of the same ground, plot-wise, none of which has anything to do with anything Howard ever wrote (Milius's script was a mixture of elements from a number of de Camp's pastiches, with some small nods to Howard here and there)... but now I don't know. They get something right, here, the vicious drive and activity that make Conan such a compelling character, and the look on his face as he gives the heads to his father (that's Perlman)... This is the Conan who's always doing things, going places, always actively pursuing his ambitions and desires no matter how much sweat and blood it takes (his or others').

This clip is, quite literally, how the beginning of Milius's Conan the Barbarian would've gone if it had actually starred the character described in Howard's stories instead of some big passive dolt they decided to call Conan.

If this is what the new film is gonna be like, I'm really looking forward to it, again.
Colt Reeves wrote:
Just FYI: My antivirus pitched a fit and said my computer was attacked when I clicked your link...

Huh. Nobody else has had that issue, myself included... but better be safe! Turns out it's now up on YouTube, although it took some serious digging to find it.

Original post edited accordingly.
But will it get the lamentations of the women?
Sam Gordon Campbell wrote:
But will it get the lamentations of the women?

If I had a woman, I'm sure she would lament the time I'll be spending on re-reading all the stories a couple of times before the movie comes out. :D

But seriously, I really prefer the way Conan actually puts it, idly stargazing with his pirate queen as their pirate crew rows their pirate galley up a mysterious unexplored river, over the paraphrased "HULK SMASH PUNY LINES!" -style Genghis Khan citation from the movie:

"I have known many gods. He who denies them is as blind as he who trusts them too deeply. I seek not beyond death. It may be the blackness averred by the Nemedian skeptics, or Crom's realm of ice and cloud, or the snowy plains and vaulted halls of the Nordheimer's Valhalla. I know not, nor do I care. Let me live deep while I live; let me know the rich juices of red meat and stinging wine on my palate, the hot embrace of white arms, the mad exultation of battle when the blue blades flame and crimson, and I am content. Let teachers and priests and philosophers brood over questions of reality and illusion. I know this: if life is illusion, then I am no less an illusion, and being thus, the illusion is real to me. I live, I burn with life, I love, I slay, and am content."
-- Robert E. Howard, Queen of the Black Coast
I just an AMAZING clip on www.break.com that shows this movies potential. It shows a young Conan and his ferocity and skill at an early age. I have fondness for the Arnold version but I read all of Howards books and the movie Conan was NOT even close to the spirit of the novels. Arnold was/is a horrible actor and his portrayal showed none of the intensity or ferocity that Howard wrote about...............Larry
Very good clip! My Salle is planning on going to this movie after our four hour longsword practice on the 20th.
I tell you man as a kid I read EVERY book. I loved the books and especially Conan. He was, to me, the ultimate anti-hero. The first movie I liked as a kid, but man what a let down when I viewed it again. It wouldn't have been so bad if it was anything else. I can tolerate a lot from Hollywood but Conan as basically a brawny idiot whom life just happens to? No way. I really really hope that at least they keep Howard's vision of Conan in this adaptation. I happen to think Jason Moma (SP) is a much better choice then Arnold look wise, but I guess it remains to be seen if he can pull off a character that was supposed to have cunning in equal proportion to his brawn. I guess we'll have to wait and see if they can pull it off. The clip does give me some hope that this version will portray Conan in the light Howard intended.
Mike Capanelli wrote:
I tell you man as a kid I read EVERY book. I loved the books and especially Conan. He was, to me, the ultimate anti-hero. The first movie I liked as a kid, but man what a let down when I viewed it again. It wouldn't have been so bad if it was anything else. I can tolerate a lot from Hollywood but Conan as basically a brawny idiot whom life just happens to? No way. I really really hope that at least they keep Howard's vision of Conan in this adaptation.

On the other hand, it did have gorgeous sets and props and costumes, a couple of great actors, some bits of really good writing, and the most epic orchestral score ever. Even more so than the entire oeuvre of John Williams. Basil Poledouris is king among gods.

Quote:
I happen to think Jason Moma (SP) is a much better choice then Arnold look wise, but I guess it remains to be seen if he can pull off a character that was supposed to have cunning in equal proportion to his brawn. I guess we'll have to wait and see if they can pull it off. The clip does give me some hope that this version will portray Conan in the light Howard intended.

Have you seen him in Stargate: Atlantis or Game of Thrones? Especially GoT, where he plays Khal Drogo, basically a barbarian warlord. Like this. :)

He demonstrably has got the stature, the presence, the moves and the acting chops, and he actually took the time to read Howard's stories to prepare for the role. Momoa totally has what it takes.

It just remains to be seen whether Marcus Nispel can make good use of him. Nispel's portfolio includes, among other things, Pathfinder, which to me actually shows promise in some regards...
...I don't think peoples heads explode like that when pushed into loose packed snow. Anyone else find the loud squelch sound and arterylike blood when he stabbed people with a broken stick to be a bit too over the top?
I read from elsewhere that the publishers are now concentrating their efforts to make it clear to the public that this new Conan has nothing to do with Arnold's movies and is based on the books from the 1930's and the comics that came thereafter.

Therefore, the lumbering half-wit Conan a la Arnold is a long-forgotten memory and this new one should be closer to the Lion that Howard wrote about. However, it remains to be seen if this will turn out to be on the level of Pathfinder (director's previous showing) or if the makers could miraculously achieve the impossible and make a good Conan movie...
"If its a story about Conan, and REH didn't write it, it will be no better than good" has always served me well.

The pronunciation of Cimmerian bugs me. The historical people who Howard borrowed the name from had a K sound not a S sound at the start of their name; if it had been a soft C Herodotus would have called the historical ones Σιμμέριοι not Κιμμέριοι. Konan the Kimerian sounds better than Konan the Simmerian! Pronouncing it with a S also makes it sound like Sumerian, which has the wrong associations (I don't think Howard was much of a linguist, but he understood how to wield sounds and associations to suggest a world in a phrase).
Mikko Kuusirati wrote:

It seems the new movie will tread some of the same ground, plot-wise, none of which has anything to do with anything Howard ever wrote (Milius's script was a mixture of elements from a number of de Camp's pastiches, with some small nods to Howard here and there)... but now I don't know. They get something right, here, the vicious drive and activity that make Conan such a compelling character, and the look on his face as he gives the heads to his father (that's Perlman)... This is the Conan who's always doing things, going places, always actively pursuing his ambitions and desires no matter how much sweat and blood it takes (his or others').

This clip is, quite literally, how the beginning of Milius's Conan the Barbarian would've gone if it had actually starred the character described in Howard's stories instead of some big passive dolt they decided to call Conan.

If this is what the new film is gonna be like, I'm really looking forward to it, again.


I agree with that assessment.

No offense to Arnold fans (I love him too as the terminator etc.), but if you read the stories before seeing those 80s movies, you know that his movie character will never fit Howard's original image of Conan. Conan was a tough, agile, smart, but naive savage who gets his streetsmarts by surviving crazy adventures in his youth, later to learn the ropes of warfare and become a great leader of men in his fictional world.

The question is, why do movie writers and producers still think they can do better than Howard's timeless plots and brilliant storytelling?
I have the Arnold versions on DVD. They got worse as they went I'll admit (not enough drinking and everyone kept all their clothes on in the later films). That said the first one is good, especially if you can watch it for what it is and not what you think it should be. my guess is that they changed the first one because far more people didn't read the books than did. For those of us in that vast unenlightened horde the movie worked. In fact it worked very well and it still works. Of course it did follow a very successful 80's formula of drinking, violence or stupidity, full frontal nudity, random hijinks, full frontal nudity, plot twist, more full frontal nudity, and some variation of happily ever after with full frontal nudity to wrap things up...basically a road-trip story with full frontal nudity!

You're all probably going to think me crazy but there is humor and nuance in that first movie. Some neat subtle bits in the background that I only appreciated with the help of the fast reverse and pause option. Very creative here and there. Very entertaining. Even if its not the Conan you knew when you spent time with the books. :cool:
I must be the odd man out here, because I like the old movies. Even the second one! Yes, they're bad and cheesy and what-not, but it's fun to watch! I even like (*shock* *horror*) Red Sonya. I probably just have bad taste, but I can really enjoy a bad movie for what it is. Sometimes me and my friends organise a bad movie night where we watch such pulpy things (alongside classics such as Evil Dead III, The Beastmaster, Peter Jackson's early work, The Princess Bride, etcetera).

I should probably say that I never read any of the Conan books, so I don't feel bad that the old movies don't even resemble them.
I will give the movie the benefit of the doubt until I see it.

However, those weapons I see in the trailer look like complete rubbish. Where did they get those things, on sale from the MRL Foam LARP Sword section? They look horrid, they don't even live up to the Kit Rae/Bud K catalogue in appearance as fantasy weapons. I think they could have done a much better job had the production designers had enough common sense to actually look at a few real sword websites. Hell, if they would have only watched a couple fantasy movies - they could have came up with better ideas.

Jody Samson would not be pleased... :cry:


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Last edited by JE Sarge on Sat 23 Jul, 2011 12:19 am; edited 1 time in total
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