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Jean Thibodeau




Location: Montreal,Quebec,Canada
Joined: 15 Mar 2004
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PostPosted: Tue 25 May, 2010 10:12 pm    Post subject: My Mom died today 25th may 2010 !         Reply with quote

Excuse the self indulgence here but my Mom just died after a short stay in hospital, she was very weak and also caught pneumonia. The hospital care was first class with very caring doctors and nurses.

She almost made it to 90 years old and died two weeks short of her birthday.

Below is a copy paste of an e-mail I sent to Nathan Robinson and a couple of close friends here and I hope that it can be a tribute to a great and loving mother that I am already missing a lot.

Quote:
E-mail copy/paste, slightly edited: Well she died yesterday early evening: They tell me it was peacefully as I missed it because I accidentally turned off my cell phone the last time I checked for messages !

They had just done a minor operation to put in a line to her blood supply to have an easy way to get blood for testing
without having to use a needle each time they needed blood ..... her veins where getting much too much bruising from repeated injections.

They finally reached me at home and I went back to the hospital for a last goodby ..... She looked very peaceful compared to what she looked like when I left her earlier that afternoon.

Unfortunately the Delirium was giving her stressful and scary visions and it was getting harder and harder to reassure her.

I don't know if she would have snapped out of it if her strength had held up but her cardiovascular system and heart was very weakened by the pneumonia. She did seem to be stable or getting through it a few days ago but I think the whole thing just got to be too stressful for her.

It did seem to help a bit when I put my hand on her forehead but the bad dreams seemed to take her over most of the time.

By a fortunate coincidence a nurse did the same thing I was doing just before she died and I would like to believe that
she may have gotten the same relief from her touch as from mine.

I have to deal with all the bureaucratic stuff one has to do after a death tomorrow and I do have a couple of long time friends here to lean on.

I think I'll be O.K. as I'm 60 years old after all and I guess I should grow up a bit, but I think i will seriously miss her as
we always got along very well and at least until recently taking care of her was not difficult and we did live together but
I was still living my own life at the same time.

One great thing is that in all the years we talked and talked nothing important was ever left unsaid and I think that she
would have agreed that dying quickly was much better than months or years of slow decline " in storage " in a long
term care facility ! I know that this would have been much harder to take than a quick end.

The best way to honour one's parents I believe is to live well until one's own time comes to go into the dark or into the light:
A life well lived is what they would have wanted for me and I can wait the thirty years or so before I join them.

Thanks for reading as writing this is helping a lot !

Oh, when it comes to dying from old age the later the better as long as one can be active and happy but otherwise
I can sort of appreciate going out fighting sword in hand .... at least as a romantic theory.

I think she died strong of heart and brave to the end or at least I want to believe it so and that in a way she and my dad will always be with me !

You can easily give up your freedom. You have to fight hard to get it back!


Last edited by Jean Thibodeau on Wed 26 May, 2010 10:23 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Gabriele A. Pini




Location: Olgiate Comasco, Como
Joined: 02 Sep 2008

Posts: 239

PostPosted: Tue 25 May, 2010 10:24 pm    Post subject:         Reply with quote

May she rest in peace in the Last Homely House!
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Christian Schlemmer




Location: Germany
Joined: 13 Dec 2009

Posts: 48

PostPosted: Tue 25 May, 2010 11:26 pm    Post subject:         Reply with quote

My condolences to you and your family.

Its always sad to see beloved people go.

May she live in a better world now.

Christian

Die Hoffnung stirbt zuletzt
-Hope dies Last-
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Artis Aboltins




PostPosted: Tue 25 May, 2010 11:35 pm    Post subject:         Reply with quote

Such things are never easy, but living a life that long is an achewement on it's own, and she will live on in your and your relatives memories for years to come, even if she herself have passed on and found a peace and release from ilness.
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J Anstey





Joined: 21 Jul 2007

Posts: 233

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 12:06 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

My condolences to you and your family

Respectfully

Jason
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Roger Hooper




Location: Northern California
Joined: 18 Aug 2003
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PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 12:19 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

I'm glad you had taken the time to say all the important things to each other. When you don't do that, it can lead to a lot of regret.
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Joel Chesser




Location: Oklahoma
Joined: 23 Oct 2003

Posts: 714

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 12:29 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

I'm really sorry to hear this Jean. I lost my grandfather earlier this year and I know it's very hard. My prayers are with you and your family.
..." The person who dosen't have a sword should sell his coat and buy one."

- Luke 22:36
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Paul Watson




Location: Upper Hutt, New Zealand
Joined: 08 Feb 2006

Posts: 387

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 12:41 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

Very sorry to hear this Jean. I've lost my mum. Mums are special and when they go it doesn't seem real as they were the ones always there for you.
I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, but that which it protects. (Faramir, The Two Towers)
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Todd M. Sullivan




Location: Upstate New York
Joined: 03 Oct 2003

Posts: 69

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 12:50 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

I'm very sorry this happened Jean. Losing one's mother is one of the most difficult stages of a man's life. I'm here if you need to talk. E-mail me for my cell number. In my prayers,

Todd
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Glen A Cleeton




Location: Nipmuc USA
Joined: 21 Aug 2003

Posts: 1,803

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 12:57 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

Sincere condolences and prayers to you and yours. It is never a best case scenario. We seem to accrue more and more as the years go by and without meaning to be flippant al all, I can only share that "so is the way of the world"

This world is not conclusion;
A sequel stands beyond,
Invisible as music,
But positive as sound.
~Emily Dickinson~

Esperance en Dieu
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Reinier van Noort





Joined: 13 Dec 2006

Posts: 165

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 1:32 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

My condolences to you and your family.
School voor Historische Schermkunsten

www.bruchius.com
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Johan S. Moen




Location: Kristiansand, Norway
Joined: 26 Jan 2004

Posts: 259

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 1:47 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

My condolences to you and your family Jean! Stay brave.

Johan Schubert Moen
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Luka Borscak




Location: Croatia
Joined: 11 Jun 2007
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PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 3:32 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

My condolences...
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Michael Edelson




Location: New York
Joined: 14 Sep 2005

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PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 4:46 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

Jean,

I'm very sorry to hear that. She was a very lucky woman though, to have lived such a long life and to have had such a devoted son who took such great care of her. You must be feeling very alone right now, but you're not. There are people here, friends, who care about you.

New York Historical Fencing Association
www.newyorklongsword.com

Byakkokan Dojo
http://newyorkbattodo.com/
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Pamela Muir




Location: Arlington, VA
Joined: 23 Sep 2004
Reading list: 34 books

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Posts: 282

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 4:50 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

Dear Jean,

My heart and prayers go out to you today. Please accept my sincere condolences and sympathy.

Your friend,
Pamela
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Michael Ahrens




Location: Staten Island & Andes NY
Joined: 27 Oct 2006
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Posts: 181

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 4:55 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

Jean

very sorry to hear this, She enjoyed a long life, and had a devoted son to care for her. just know that me and mine hold you in our prayers and feel for your loss.


Mike Ahrens

Mike Ahrens
http://www.selohaar.org/

Staten Island German Martial Arts (S.I.G.M.A.)
http://www.sigmanewyork.webs.com/

Member of the 1st Universal Church of St. John Cantius Garand, Reformed (Gas Port)
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Scott Hrouda




Location: Minnesota, USA
Joined: 17 Nov 2006
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Posts: 643

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 5:03 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

Jean,

Please accept my condolences. Celebrate the fact your mother experienced 90 great years. Take comfort in remembering all the great times you spent together.

Sincerely,
Scott

...and that, my liege, is how we know the Earth to be banana shaped. - Sir Bedevere
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G. Ghazarian
Industry Professional



Location: Florida USA
Joined: 01 Nov 2005

Posts: 215

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 5:54 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

Jean, I'm very sorry to hear this.

I understand the void this creates in your heart. May you have the courage.

My sincere condoleances.

Gabriel

G. Ghazarian
http://gloryships.com/
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Daniel Staberg




Location: Gothenburg/Sweden
Joined: 30 Apr 2005
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PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 6:09 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

Jean,

I'm very sorry to hear this, please accept my condolences.

Daniel

"There is nothing more hazardous than to venture a battle. One can lose it
by a thousand unforseen circumstances, even when one has thorougly taken all
precautions that the most perfect military skill allows for."
-Fieldmarshal Lennart Torstensson.
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Brian K.
Industry Professional



Location: Salt Lake City, Utah
Joined: 01 Jan 2008

Posts: 717

PostPosted: Wed 26 May, 2010 6:13 am    Post subject:         Reply with quote

My condolences to you and your family
Brian Kunz
www.dbkcustomswords.com
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